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Removing the Mask of Kindness: The Diagnosis and Treatment of the Caretaker Personality Disorder (2006)

"In his strikingly accessible language, Dr. Barbanell uncovers and elegantly elaborates what lies at the base of many individuals' relentless quest to help, to give, to empathize, and to heal. His investigation of the caretaking personality, particularly in light of its historical and traumatic antecedents, substantially deepens our understanding of the dynamics of human accomodation and its intent to preclude rejection and abandonment. Dr. Barbanell creatively explores and describes the developmental implications of the caretaking personality, who, with help, may strive to reach beyond the mandates and strictures of being-for-others and to restore instead a sense of self in relation to others that is centered on a balance of give-and-receive, eventuating in a more authentic connection with others. Especially compelling is Dr. Barbanell's practical elucidation of the vicissitudes of and necessity for our continuing search for human relatedness and authenticity."
- William J. Coburn, Ph.D., Psy.D.
  Editor, International Journal of Psychoanalytic Self Psychology

"Utilizing traditional work on sublimation, the later focus on childhood trauma, considerable clinical experience and contemporary relational paradigms, Dr. Barbanell has formulated a provocative and compelling new personality configuration and disorder. The Caretaker Personality Disorder is of general relevance for psychotherapeutic work and has specific usefulness for those who provide psychological care."
- Richard Munich, Ph.D.

Breaking the Addiction to Please: Goodbye Guilt (2009/2010)

"Barbanell, Les. Breaking the Addiction To Please: Goodbye to Guilt. Rowman & Littlefield. Jan. 2010. c.120p. ISBN 978-0-7657-0674-4. $26.95. PSYCH Psychotherapist Barbanell (supervisor, New Jersey Inst. for Training; Removing the Mask of Kindness) presents an important analysis of the less-known "caretaker personality disorder," characterized as an addiction to helping others. These unusual caregivers have a craving to please and an uncontrollable desire to give without receiving. While the initial positive response from the receivers is the "high" for the helping caregiver, many receivers soon begin to feel intruded upon and controlled by the obsessive caregiver. Here, he offers insights gleaned from his unique practice; explains the basic traits of the addiction, the role of the unconsciousness in the etiology of the disorder, and typical masks that hide underlying emotional turmoil; and presents practical suggestions for long-term recovery and stability.
Barbanell frankly integrates his own personal experiences as a recovering pleaser. Both this work and his earlier title provide a foundation to understand better this relatively obscure disorder. A vital work for those in the helping professions and people suffering from this disorder."
- Dale Farris, Groves, TX
  Library Journal


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